Saturday, September 19, 2009


I'm struggling with many things right now and one of them is this blog.

Blogs are interesting. If they're not tied to a business, the writer walks a fine line with a blog. A business blog has a specific purpose. A personal blog is not so clearcut. It's not wise to treat it like a diary. Much too personal and possibly a burden to those reading it. On the other hand, I've never been good at the superficial facade that society practices. Probably why I don't have a lot of friends...just a handful of cherished relationships. I'm pretty transparent, sometimes painfully so. When I'm struggling it's hard for me to pretend otherwise. Life's been a struggle the last few weeks so I'm sorry I haven't posted.

What am I struggling with?

My job. It is difficult to put so much into something and see so little positive come out of it. What has happened to a society where you have to fight parents about not allowing 10 year olds to wear make up, high heels, and long dangling earrings to school? Where expecting 5th graders to actually do the assigned work makes you a "too-strict" unreasonable teacher?

My faith. God and I are not speaking at the moment. My pastor would probably tell me that this is a sign that I'm not really a believer. I think he's wrong. All relationships go through times where feelings are strained, why not the most important relationship of all? I'm a finite creature trying to understand the infinite and it's not easy. The shallow mantras offered by fellow people of faith in the throes of adversity don't cut it with me, so it's back to just me and God slogging through the mire I sometimes feel myself to be in.

The unfairness of weight loss. Ha! Had to throw in one humorous bit lest you read my blog and wallow in despair as a result. Norm and I have done a FANTASTIC job of continuing our great eating and our exercise program. Norm looks wonderful. He has lost over 20 pounds!!! More importantly, he feels great. I feel great too and have lost about 12 pounds. (See? Life is NOT fair!)
Through all my struggles, I am so thankful that I am loved. Really loved. I pray that as you go through your struggles you know that you also are loved.
P.S. I promised my feline follower that I would include items of interest for her in my posts. Animal note: yesterday a mama moose and her two babies were breakfasting in our back yard. Makes it exciting when I go up the driveway in the dark of early morning to get the paper.

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